September 24, 1944

Sept 24, 1944

Dear A.P.

Well the thing I have been worrying about is about to happen.  Ever since primary I have feared that someday I would be given an assignment to fly heavy ships.  A single engine pilot wants to fly alone because he feels he is safer that way with none of the responsibility of a bomber pilot.  The pilot of a single engine ship is the heart of the ship where the pilot of a heavy plane is just one of the cogs in the wheel.  I want to be the wheel but the higher ups have other ideas.

They have decided that they will try to replace the heart of an eagle with one from a sparrow.  Now they have got to make the sparrow act like an eagle if possible.  There are going to be a lot of eagles acting like sparrows.

What I mean is this: tomorrow I expect an assignment to B17 school.  This is almost the worst thing that can happen to a fighter.  The orders came through and all we know is that 7 out of our bunch of 60 will not go.  How I hope I don't have to go but my chances of not going are not too good.  All I can say is that when our bunch of fighter plane pilots hit the B17s there are going to be a lot of B17s acting like fighter planes.  Also I doubt if there will be many good pilots among the bunch although in P39s they would have been a hot outfit.

B17 Bomber
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If they had told me that I was to be a B17 pilot while I was in basic I would have a little respect for the big lumbering 4 engined clay pigeons.  right now I would rather resign than to stay and fly them.  Nothing I learn from my next station will help me as a civilian pilot.  I will become a "Stick and rudder" man and by the time the war is over I will have lost all the qualities of a good pilot, namely coordination, and self reliance.  You know I will still be saying "they can't do this to me" even when I am out on some raid and the shells are bursting all around that flying box car.  

Well so much for the bum luck that seems to be dogging my trail.  I had to work on an inventory today and last night so I didn't leave the post.  That is another thing that makes me mad.  All week you stay on the post because of regulations and the one day you can leave they make you work.  I guess I don't have much to write about except my misfortunes.

Say, tell Mother that the ring can be sent along anytime.  It will catch up with me in my travel all right.  I had begun to wonder what had happened to it.  I began to think about it the  first of this month and heard nothing and thought maybe you all were saving it for a surprise which does not seem to be the case.  I hope that it has been sent by now but if not see that something is done about it.

Well we are having a wonderful dust storm now.  It is just covering everything with a layer of find powder.  It would be nice if the powder were a pretty shade but it is just a dirty color so not very welcome.  Nothing we are getting there is very welcome.  I guess the wings are the only things I got here that made me very happy.

As you see I am very discouraged and need something to help my morale.  Why does the Army do things the way they do anyway?

With love

Austin