October 9
Dear Doc,
I hope I am capable of conveying to you what I want to say to you by means of a letter. It probably will be most inefficient. It seems so difficult to explain when it really need not be an explanation at all! I believe, Doc, you have formed some very definite ideas and conclusions about me which are entirely wrong and unjustifiable. This I surmised from your letter to Jo. Whatever happened to us I do not know. I guess we need not go into the subject further. However, I would be interested in knowing what you meant by the "unsurmountable obstacle". I didn't know we were faced by any obstacles.
Our times together have been the most completely pleasant times I have known. Everything we did together was fun. I have not known such continual pleasure since. They are not easy to forget and truthfully I do not want to. It isn't natural for one to want to forget the good and that which one enjoys or has enjoyed. we have done many wonderful things together. Many which I shall remember always as it is impossible to think of San Antonio and not think of you.
This, Doc, is not an appeal to your sentiments. I want to tell you I am sorry. I realize now that unmindfully, unwillingly, unknowingly I have hurt you. Something I never want to consider myself guilty of - ever hurting anyone - as I know what it is to be hurt. A most unpleasant experience. People are so selfish, so self centered. They really don't give a care about anyone except themselves. I have become very cynical.
I was very happy to hear you are having such a wonderful time in school. Also that you were going. Generally speaking, people waste so much time not ever making time out to appreciate the day.
You may be interested - in the past events of the past year. Good heavens, does it seem possible? It is really a year since S.A.? It seems like just months ago. Anyway, Jo and I had a most pleasant summer. We counseled at one of the girls camps in Northern Wisconsin. Was a great life. Plenty of sleep, fresh air, good food, and no intoxicating beverages which is just what one needs after living in S.A. any length of time. Agree?
Oh yes, I also had my tonsils removed. Remember the day Jo had hers removed? Anyway, mine gave me a rather bad time and it was quite some time before I recovered. However, I must say I enjoyed breakfasts in bed- Jo is a wonderful nurse! In fact I have employed her for a lifetime. She is convinced now - (that is upon your suggestion) that I need her. The latter part of your suggestion may be rather "far-fetched" It is going to be quite some time before I settle down - if that is what one calls it and apparently it is. That is all too easy, settling down I mean.
I hope you are not bored, Doc. You are the one person I want to write long letter to. Alright so I haven't proved myself - I haven't the slightest idea what your reaction will be upon receiving this. I hope favorable. I sincerely and honestly do not want you to feel bitter toward me. I value what we have had and want very much for us to be friends. Is that asking a great deal? Doc, I'm not trying to rekindle an old flame - as the trite saying goes - I can understand how you feel and how you felt after I stopped writing. How was I to know, Doc?
By the way, "There is something about a soldier" I still have the music box -
We received a letter from Bill, however not a word about his approaching marriage. He sent the "shot" he took that day in N.M. - yee gads, what a fright. Also sent one of you and one of himself, very nice. Just what we needed for our album - great addition. Perhaps he will favor us with a wedding announcement. I doubt it.
I must close - I shall bore you no longer. Please try to understand what I so poorly have tried to say to you.
Recently I have read something I think you would enjoy - I conveys a great thought. It is Willa Cather's - Two Friends - It is a short story - really worth anyone's time.
As ever,
Anne Roberts
Speaking of recent readings - I am now reading Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. It is wonderful - I think you would enjoy it very much - With me it ranks next to Wolfe - For a book - I consider that quite a rating among the Robert's repertoire.
Oh yes, I also had my tonsils removed. Remember the day Jo had hers removed? Anyway, mine gave me a rather bad time and it was quite some time before I recovered. However, I must say I enjoyed breakfasts in bed- Jo is a wonderful nurse! In fact I have employed her for a lifetime. She is convinced now - (that is upon your suggestion) that I need her. The latter part of your suggestion may be rather "far-fetched" It is going to be quite some time before I settle down - if that is what one calls it and apparently it is. That is all too easy, settling down I mean.
I hope you are not bored, Doc. You are the one person I want to write long letter to. Alright so I haven't proved myself - I haven't the slightest idea what your reaction will be upon receiving this. I hope favorable. I sincerely and honestly do not want you to feel bitter toward me. I value what we have had and want very much for us to be friends. Is that asking a great deal? Doc, I'm not trying to rekindle an old flame - as the trite saying goes - I can understand how you feel and how you felt after I stopped writing. How was I to know, Doc?
By the way, "There is something about a soldier" I still have the music box -
We received a letter from Bill, however not a word about his approaching marriage. He sent the "shot" he took that day in N.M. - yee gads, what a fright. Also sent one of you and one of himself, very nice. Just what we needed for our album - great addition. Perhaps he will favor us with a wedding announcement. I doubt it.
I must close - I shall bore you no longer. Please try to understand what I so poorly have tried to say to you.
Recently I have read something I think you would enjoy - I conveys a great thought. It is Willa Cather's - Two Friends - It is a short story - really worth anyone's time.
As ever,
Anne Roberts
Speaking of recent readings - I am now reading Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. It is wonderful - I think you would enjoy it very much - With me it ranks next to Wolfe - For a book - I consider that quite a rating among the Robert's repertoire.
