July 19, 1947 (Saturday)

Saturday

My dearest Doc,

My, what a serious letter it was - the one I received this morning. I am glad you have been doing some serious thinking. But promise you won't do too much!  It is a glorious, wonderful feeling being in love with you. Doc Rounds, What have I done to deserve it? and everything will work out beautifully well. Really, Doc, we have no desperate problems.  Firstly - of course, I shall come to Boston - Because I want to be with you and also get to know your family and have them get to know and like me.  Do you think they will?  Nothing is really difficult if we do it together. What do you think?

Also we have no religious p problem - yes it would be easier if we were of the same religion - But we aren't - so we shall face reality and go on from there.  This would be so much easier if you were here, please come. It does not matter to me what my parents think - you are the one that counts. But I am getting off the subject - I really have no right to ask you to turn Catholic and I wouldn't want you to if that is what you did not want to do.  Religious is important to me - perhaps because my parents have always been so strict - but it is not my entire life, if so, I would dash off and join a convent.  We could still have our religion if we were married. Are you, or have you proposed?  If you don't - guess I'll have to be the aggressive one and do it. Really, Doc, I can't wait for "leap year."

I'm sorry, Doc, but tell me of a person who can forsee the future - Alone, do you know what's ahead? You're wonderful if you do!  What do you see for me?

Doc, I don't care what Elinor or any other sister of mine has done - I know what's good for me and also, what I wand to do with my life. We are all individuals. Yes, it was an unfortunate experience for Elinor - not for the family though. There are no scars, unless one looks might long and deep. Elixir has a wonderful life now and is very happy - Don't you know that?  It was all wrong - from the start - she was only 19 - out for excitement - which sh got - but that has nothing do to with us - If I hadn't told you about that you'd have never known - so what would you have thought about?

We can't say we know a little about each other - That is not so. We know enough to be in love. You do love me - don't you, Doc?  Gosh, I love you I'm so sure of it.  To think the first time I tell you it would have to be via mail. Oh hell, why aren't you here? I would tell you it a million times.

Excuse me - I have just retired to the back yard. Carl has been given me a bad time. Really, the sun feels good it has been quite cold and rainy. Why aren't you around? Are you getting anything out of my letters? It is all so simple when you are around. Listen my pet, why don't you come, in August and I could go back with you - to stay in Boston for the winter or forever - as we see fit. California can with.  We can go together - you see, you are the important one in my life - the thing, the utmost is for us to be together, "Together" that's my theme song form now on.

As for knowing my family, you have met most of it - Elinor has really been a mother to me. Strange, but I really have never been very close to my parents. Dad may be very difficult to understand. I'm all too serious.  Let me tell you - I love you.

Thjis has been bothering me. Why do you say you feel sorry for me? You haven't changed your mind, have you? Doc, don't do anything you don't want to do, really. I'm being honest with you. I love you. Is there anything else I can say? Don't feel sorry for me. I don't need sympathy. That is not what I want!

No, I don't know what you mean, yes, we have cheated ourselves out of sic months of living, but why cheat ourselves out of a lifetime? I'm responsible for those six months - I'll make it up to you, promise I will.

Something on the lighter side - you should have been here last night. A neighbor couple came over about 9:30 with mint and a thirst for mint juleps, which we had.  They were pretty good but not being a drinking woman I had only one. Also had a putting contest on the living room rug - everyone was pretty stiff so the putting was unspeakable. After my golf game of the a afternoon. I wonder why I try?

Keep up the good work.  I'm referring to your letter writing. I love your letters, they are all we have beside memories - and each other - You are really in my life now, Doc - and you can't get away. Do you mind?

Tomorrow is Sunday and no mail. - to bad - I'm continually waiting for letter so be good. This - as you mentioned is not one sided. What can I do to make you understand? What do you mean by being onesided anyway?? It is definitely not that!!! Doc, what do you want straightened out? Doc, don't do anything you don't want to do - Oh hell, why didn't we go through this when we were together - I can't express my thoughts very well on paper - Some critic I'd make.

No matter what you think - or how much you weigh - measure - and decide - remember - love you! That should make all unpleasantness (there can be none) oblivious.

Say you'll come - in August - please!

All my love, 

Anne

Card flap - I hope this letter doesn't make you weary. I don't want you to be unhappy ever. A big kiss for you.